Suffering....

Suffering,  the word itself denotes a vast range of emotional response to situataions in life. It is entirely to do with feelings,suffering is always felt..experienced. The worse part is that only the one who suffers can feel it..no amount of words or talks can put u in the shoes of the person who is suffering.however much i say that i understand but the fact remains that i cannot really feel wht u r feeling.

Rule 1..take one at a time..do not try to solve all ur problems at once say for eg.u have problem with ur wife,ur parents.ur children ,your boss and ur colleagues...now out of this pick up the problem which is the least important but it is still a problem...say its with ur mom...so ur target is that leat problem with ur mom.

Rule 2..set a time frame.set a rigid time frame...say a week...once u have done dat...focus fully on that one problem

Rule 3...most of the times it is about other peoples expectation...if there is a communication gap...many a times we are misunderstood or we on our own misunderstand the other person...so take out time to find out wht is the crux of the problem.is it u? give it a shot...step into the other persons shoes and see if u cud be the reason for the problem..if yes...is that reason correctable..if yes then correct it..not suddenly but slow and steady one step at a time and see the response of the other person....things should change..but if the problem is with the other person and u want the other person to change...u need to say it clearly to the other person...if the situation is beyond repair then leave it..
Now the next suffering and use the same...dont try to fight the battle unarmed ...strategise and work on it....change urself ...change the way u feel about things...look at what u have got...and wht others dont have...u have the HEALTH...which many ppl would not be having despite having wealth ,love of the family etc...suffering is a feeling...and u can always change or work on the way u feel....

4 Engineers...

 Engineer woh hai

jo aksar fasta hai
interviews ke sawaal me
badi companiyon ke jal me
boss aur client ke bawaal me
engineer  woh hai
jo pak gaya hai
meetings ki jhelai me
submissions ki gehraai me
teamwork ki chataai me
engineer woh hai
jo laga rahta hai
sechdule ko fislane me
targets ko khiskane me
roz naye naye bahane banaane me
engineer  woh hai
jo lunch time me breakfast leta hai
dinner time me lunch karta hai
aur
commutation ke waqt soya karta hai
engineer  woh hai
jo paagal hai
chai aur samose ke pyaar mey
cigarette ke khumar mey
birdwatching ke wichaar mey
engineer  woh hai
jo khoya hai
reminders ke jawab me
na milne wale hisab me
behtar bhavishya ke khwab me
engineer  woh hai
jise intezaar hai
weekend night par dhoom machane ka
boss ke chhuti par jane ka
increment ki khabar aane ka
engineer woh hai
jo sochta hai
kaash padhai par dhyaan diya hota
kaash teacher se panga na liya hota
kaash ishq na kiya hota.....
HAVE   A  GREAT  DAY
May all Engineers live in peace...

Arrange Marriage - Very Touchyyyy..

Every girl's desire who go in for an arranged marriage.............

The woods were lovely dark and deep. Walking slowly beside her, in the

damp mud road, was her husband whom she barely knew. He was very

relaxed, happily watching a group of kids playing at a distance.

Her "mehandi" was still dark and smelling fresh, reminding of the

excitements and tension 2 days back. "It can't work this way

mom...please stop this", she kept telling her mother till the last

moment, who wouldn't listen but carry on with beautifying her. She had

been crying all night and her make-up had to be patched up twice or

thrice to hide her awkwardly swollen face.

It was too late now. She had to get married "NOW" to the guy...The guy

whom she had seen once and talked thrice. The guy about whom she knew

nothing at all but for his name and work. Everything happened in a

hurry and everything was over before she could breathe again... here

was she with this guy, all alone in this hill station... how can

anybody send their daughter such a long distance with a stranger???

"Hey look at that....!!!" he shouted in excitement... she shrugged and

looked where his finger pointed...

Bright colored balloons dotted the sky. Children were jumping in joy

and he seemed to be completely absorbed into it...colors are always

exciting...but not now. She was not with her friends, not with her team

mates, not even with her parents. This was not a 3 day tour or team

building trip. This was her life and she has been forced to start off

with this person.

Loneliness and discomfort with this stranger was sickening...She

looked at him in wonder... does he even realize that he has married

me? Does he understand that he has to love me, protect me, care for me, a

new girl, a stranger, all his life?

The marriage morning started like a daylight nightmare for her. The

first time in life she felt she should have fallen in love and then

married somebody. Some man who she would have felt more comfortable

with, someone whom she could call by name and introduce to friends,

someone whom she could trust. But marriage morning was obviously not

the time to think all these.

Her parents would never have said "no" if she had declared that she

was in love. But she was not emotionally attached to anybody she

met, especially guys. She was very friendly, playing, teasing, but never

had second thought for any man around her. That brought the entire

responsibility of looking for a groom on her parents' shoulders. Her

parents had had a very bad time with this entire process. They started

their groom search with unending "&" operation. The concatenation of

"Horoscope matching" & "Decent family" & "Good looking" & "Good pay" &

"same cast" & so on... that always gave 0 output. Now after all that 8

months hunt, they were not ready to hear her "ifs" and "buts" for this

'good guy'.

She had explained to her father. She does not feel anything for this

person. He is nothing more to me than any other software

professional. Like list of names she sees in the chat rooms. Distant

and usual...Her father asked her to talk to him and even meet him and

discuss their likes and dislikes. That meeting started like the

induction programme self introduction and ended like a 3 hour

seminar. She was waiting to get away from that place." So did you talk

with him?"."yes"."was he polite and decent"."Yes"."Oh he got that

special flavored tri-color ice-cream...!!!".OK. All her family and

relatives discussed...She was given the chance to "understand her life

partner" and that they have understood each other "well" and she is

ready for the marriage now.

All arrangements geared up and it was 24 days after her first meeting

that she was getting married to her man... perfect match as everybody

else described. Marriage hall was full with excited people, kids got

the chance to play, ladies got the chance to wear the silk saree.The

smell of rose and jasmine filled the hall. Different poses for the

photographer and artificial smiles for the videos. The moment he had

tied the sacred thread was unexplainable vaccum in the head. It was

over. She was his wife. Accepted by the society and law. Her proud

parents were relaxed. This was their duty they had been planning to

fulfill since she was born. All this crowd will fade away, leaving her

to explore her new world...

He pulled her hand gently to sit on the stone bench. The bench was wet

and the chillness was indeed enjoyable." So what are you thinking

about?"... that was an unexpected ball. Should she reply? Should she be

silent? She remembered the two hour presentation she had taken last

month. Bold and confident, she kept answering all the queries with a

broad smile. Now she remained silent." Do you know honey... I was not

for this marriage too..." Oh my God... what did I hear??? Did HE tell

that or did I think aloud? What does he mean? Didnt he like me? Was he

forced into this? He must have noticed the quizzical look on my

face...with a gentle smile he continued..."I wanted to look for a girl

myself, buy her everything, care for her, argue with her, laugh and cry

with her, then get married to her... Anything otherwise would be a

drama. Traditional drama and I was not for it anytime. But my love for

my work and also my stress would not give me time and mind to search

that girl...When your parents talked to me 2 weeks before our

marriage, about your fear of getting married, to a stranger, I could

completely understand your mind. I could see myself in you and that

was the moment I decided I will marry you. There was no time to prove

myself to you, make you trust me, everything happened in a hurry. But

there was the entire life before me, to please you, to love you, to

make you trust me. This is no less than what I had dreamt, the girl i

was waiting for, is you. Now tell me... will you love me???" Tears came

down her cheek. Her parents had done more than their duty. They had

found her the perfect guy. Thank you Mom!!! Thank you Dad!!! His

question remained unanswered yet both knew the answer....

Instructions For Life

* Give people more than they expect and do it cheerfully.
* Memorize your favorite poem.
* Don’t believe all you hear, spend all you have or sleep all you want.
* When you say, “I love you”, mean it.
* When you say, “I’m sorry”, look the person in the eye.

* Be engaged at least six months before you get married.
* Believe in love at first sight.
* Never laugh at anyone’s dreams.
* Love deeply and passionately. You might get hurt but it’s the only way to live life completely.
* In disagreements, fight fairly. No name calling.

* Don’t judge people by their relatives.
* Talk slowly but think quickly.
* When someone asks you a question you don’t want to answer, smile and ask, “Why do you want to know?”
* Remember that great love and great achievements involve great risk.
* Call your mom.

* Say “bless you” when you hear someone sneeze.
* When you lose, don’t lose the lesson.
* Remember the three R’s: Respect for self; Respect for others; Responsibility for all your actions.
* Don’t let a little dispute injure a great friendship.
* When you realize you’ve made a mistake, take immediate steps to correct it.

* Smile when picking up the phone. The caller will hear it in your voice.
* Marry a man/woman you love to talk to. As you get older, their conversational skills will be as important as any other.
* Spend some time alone.
* Open your arms to change, but don’t let go of your values.
* Remember that silence is sometimes the best answer.

* Read more books and watch less TV.
* Live a good, honorable life. Then when you get older and think back, you’ll get to enjoy it a second time.
* Trust in God but lock your car.
* A loving atmosphere in your home is so important. Do all you can to create a tranquil harmonious home.
* In disagreements with loved ones, deal with the current situation. Don’t bring up the past.

* Read between the lines.
* Share your knowledge. It’s a way to achieve immortality.
* Be gentle with the earth.
* Pray. There’s immeasurable power in it.
* Never interrupt when you are being flattered.

* Mind your own business.
* Don’t trust a man/woman who doesn’t close his/her eyes when you kiss.
* At least once a year, go someplace you’ve never been before.
* If you make a lot of money, put it to use helping others while you are living. That is wealth’s greatest satisfaction.
* Remember that not getting what you want is sometimes a stroke of luck.

* Learn the rules then break some.
* Remember that the best relationship is one where your love for each other is greater than your need for each other.
* Judge your success by what you had to give up in order to get it.
* Remember that your character is your destiny.
* Approach love and cooking with reckless abandon.