એક દીકરી તો સાસરે જઈને ફરીથી મમ્મી જેવું જીવે છે(જીવવાનો પ્રયત્ન કરે છે). જે મમ્મી વિષે લગ્ન પહેલાં કદાચ કોઈ દીકરી એટલું નથી વિચારતી, જેટલું લગ્ન પછીની જવાબદારીઓ નિભાવતી વખતે એને વિચારે છે અને એ પ્રમાણે એનાં બદલાતા રૂટીન ને જીવે છે. કદાચ માનસિક પરિવર્તન પામે છે. લગ્ન પહેલા, પોતે શું કરવા માંગે છે કે ફ્યુચર, કે કરિયર કે એવી એવી જ થીયરીની વાતો કરતી દરેક દીકરી, સાસરે ગયા પછી પ્રેક્ટીકલ લાઈફમાં બહુ બદલાઈ જતી હોય છે.
લોકો લગ્ન પહેલા છોકરીના વિચારો જાણવા આતુર હોય છે, અને એ પ્રમાણે જ એનું અવલોકન કરે છે, પણ મને લાગે છે, કે એ માત્ર થીયરી છે, છોકરી લગ્ન પછી પ્રેક્ટીકલ લાઈફમાં કેવી હશે એ માટે એની મમ્મીના વિચારોનું પણ થોડું અવલોકન બહુ જરૂરી છે. કારણકે ઘણું ખરું એ અંગત જીવનમાં એની મમ્મીની પ્રતિકૃતિ જ બને છે. બહાર લોકોની દ્રષ્ટીએ સામાજિક બદલાવમાં ભલે એ ગમે તેટલી આધુનિક કેમ નાં હોય, લગ્ન પછી અચૂક માનસિક સ્તરે એ સંબંધોમાં વધારે સહનશીલ અને વિવેકી બને છે.
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Family. Show all posts
Friday, August 19, 2011
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
કાલ ની "દીકરી" આજ વહુ થઇ ગઇ
કાલ ની "દીકરી" આજ વહુ થઇ ગઇ,
કાલે જલશા કરતી હવે સાસરીયા મા સેવા કરતી થઇ ગઇ
કાલ જીન...્સ પહેરતી આજે સાડી પહેરતી થઇ ગઇ
માવતર મા વેહતી ચંચલ નદી સાસરીયે ધીર ગંભીર થઇ ગઇ
રોજ છુટ થી પૈસા વાપરતી આજ શાકભાજી ના ભાવતાલ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
કાલે સ્કુટી ફુલ સ્પીડે ચલાવતી એ આજે બાઇક મા પાછડ બેસતી થઇ ગઇ ગઇ
કાલ સુધી ૩ ટાઇમ બિન્દાસ જમતી આજે ૩ ટાઇમ જમવાનુ બનાવતી થઇ ગઇ
હંમેશા પોતાનુ ધાર્યુ કરતી આજ પતી નુ ધાર્યુ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
માં પાસે કામ કરાવતી આજે સાસુ નુ કામ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
બહેન સાથે લડતી ઝગડતી આજે નનંદ નુ ક્હયુ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
ભાભી ની મજાક કરતી આજ જેઠાણી ને આદર આપતી થઇ ગઇ
પિતા ના આંખ નુ પાણી આજ સસરા ના ગ્લાસ નુ પાણી થઇ ગઇ
છતા પણ પિતા કહે છે વાહ મારી આંખ નુ રતન મારી " દીકરી " સાસરીયે જઇ સુખી થઇ ગઇ
કાલે જલશા કરતી હવે સાસરીયા મા સેવા કરતી થઇ ગઇ
કાલ જીન...્સ પહેરતી આજે સાડી પહેરતી થઇ ગઇ
માવતર મા વેહતી ચંચલ નદી સાસરીયે ધીર ગંભીર થઇ ગઇ
રોજ છુટ થી પૈસા વાપરતી આજ શાકભાજી ના ભાવતાલ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
કાલે સ્કુટી ફુલ સ્પીડે ચલાવતી એ આજે બાઇક મા પાછડ બેસતી થઇ ગઇ ગઇ
કાલ સુધી ૩ ટાઇમ બિન્દાસ જમતી આજે ૩ ટાઇમ જમવાનુ બનાવતી થઇ ગઇ
હંમેશા પોતાનુ ધાર્યુ કરતી આજ પતી નુ ધાર્યુ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
માં પાસે કામ કરાવતી આજે સાસુ નુ કામ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
બહેન સાથે લડતી ઝગડતી આજે નનંદ નુ ક્હયુ કરતી થઇ ગઇ
ભાભી ની મજાક કરતી આજ જેઠાણી ને આદર આપતી થઇ ગઇ
પિતા ના આંખ નુ પાણી આજ સસરા ના ગ્લાસ નુ પાણી થઇ ગઇ
છતા પણ પિતા કહે છે વાહ મારી આંખ નુ રતન મારી " દીકરી " સાસરીયે જઇ સુખી થઇ ગઇ
Tuesday, July 5, 2011
Go and thank ur dad
At age 8, your dad buys you an ice cream. You thanked him by dripping
it all over your lap.
When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
by never even bothering to practice.
When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by
jumping out
of the car and never looking back.
When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.
When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.
When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was becoming old fashioned
You thanked him by telling him he had no
taste.
When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.
When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.
When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
thanked him by taking it every chance you could.
When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
by being on the phone all night.
When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
him by staying out partying until dawn.
When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus
carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.
When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
how deep he loved you. You thanked him by moving
halfway across the
country.
When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take ca re of him . You
thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their
children.
And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART. If you love your dad, send
this to all of ur Friends.If you don't then shame on u.'
it all over your lap.
When you were 9 years old, he paid for piano lessons. You thanked him
by never even bothering to practice.
When you were 10 years old he drove you all day, from soccer to
football to one birthday party after another. You thanked him by
jumping out
of the car and never looking back.
When you were 11 years old, he took you and your friends to
the movies. You thanked him by asking to sit in a different row.
When you were 12 years old, he warned you not to watch
certain TV shows. You thanked him by waiting until he left the house.
When you were 13, he suggested a haircut that was becoming old fashioned
You thanked him by telling him he had no
taste.
When you were 14, he paid for a month away at summer camp.
You thanked him by forgetting to write a single letter.
When you were 15, he came home from work, looking for a hug.
You thanked him by having your bedroom door locked.
When you were 16, he taught you how to drive his car. You
thanked him by taking it every chance you could.
When you were 17, he was expecting an important call. You thanked him
by being on the phone all night.
When you were 18, he cried at your high school graduation. You thanked
him by staying out partying until dawn.
When you were 19, he paid for your college tuition, drove you to campus
carried your bags. You thanked him by saying good-bye outside the dorm
so you wouldn't be embarrassed in front of your friends.
When you were 25, he helped to pay for your wedding, and he told you
how deep he loved you. You thanked him by moving
halfway across the
country.
When you were 50, he fell ill and needed you to take ca re of him . You
thanked him by reading about the burden parents become to their
children.
And then, one day, he quietly died. And everything you never did came
crashing down like thunder on YOUR HEART. If you love your dad, send
this to all of ur Friends.If you don't then shame on u.'
Saturday, June 25, 2011
Most important part of the Body
My mother used to ask me what the most important part of the body is.
Through the years I would take a guess at what I thought was the correct Answer.
When I was younger, I thought sound was very important to us as humans, so I said, 'My ears, Mommy.'
She said, 'No. Many people are deaf. But you keep thinking about it and I will ask you again soon.'
Several years passed before she asked me again. Since making my first attempt, I had contemplated the correct answer.
So this time I told her, 'Mommy, sight is very important to everybody, so it must be our eyes.'
She looked at me and told me, 'You are learning fast, but the answer is not correct because there are many people who are blind.'
Stumped again, I continued my quest for knowledge and over the years,
Mother asked me a couple more times and always her answer was, 'No. But you are getting smarter every year, my child.'
Then one year, my grandfather died. Everybody was hurt. Everybody was crying. Even my father cried. I remember that especially because it was only the
second time I saw him cry.
My Mom looked at me when it was our turn to say our final good-bye to my Grandfather. She asked me, 'Do you know the most important body part
yet, my dear?' I was shocked when she asked me this now. I always thought this was a game between her and me..
She saw the confusion on my face and told me, 'This question is very important. It shows that you have really lived in your life. For every body part you gave me in the past, I have told you were wrong and I have given you an example why.
But today is the day you need to learn this important lesson.'
She looked down at me as only a mother can. I saw her eyes well up with tears. She said, 'My dear, the most important body part is your shoulder.'
I asked, 'Is it because it holds up my head?'
She replied, 'No, it is because it can hold the head of a friend or a loved one when they cry. Everybody needs a shoulder to cry on sometime in life, my dear. I only hope that you have enough love and friends that you will always have a shoulder to cry on when you need it.'
Then and there I knew the most important body part is not a selfish one.
It is made for others and not for yourself. It is sympathetic to the pain of others.
People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did . But people will NEVER forget how you made them feel.
The origination of this letter is unknown, but it brings a blessing to everyone who passes it on. Good friends are like stars...You don't always see them, but you always know they are there.
Through the years I would take a guess at what I thought was the correct Answer.
When I was younger, I thought sound was very important to us as humans, so I said, 'My ears, Mommy.'
She said, 'No. Many people are deaf. But you keep thinking about it and I will ask you again soon.'
Several years passed before she asked me again. Since making my first attempt, I had contemplated the correct answer.
So this time I told her, 'Mommy, sight is very important to everybody, so it must be our eyes.'
She looked at me and told me, 'You are learning fast, but the answer is not correct because there are many people who are blind.'
Stumped again, I continued my quest for knowledge and over the years,
Mother asked me a couple more times and always her answer was, 'No. But you are getting smarter every year, my child.'
Then one year, my grandfather died. Everybody was hurt. Everybody was crying. Even my father cried. I remember that especially because it was only the
second time I saw him cry.
My Mom looked at me when it was our turn to say our final good-bye to my Grandfather. She asked me, 'Do you know the most important body part
yet, my dear?' I was shocked when she asked me this now. I always thought this was a game between her and me..
She saw the confusion on my face and told me, 'This question is very important. It shows that you have really lived in your life. For every body part you gave me in the past, I have told you were wrong and I have given you an example why.
But today is the day you need to learn this important lesson.'
She looked down at me as only a mother can. I saw her eyes well up with tears. She said, 'My dear, the most important body part is your shoulder.'
I asked, 'Is it because it holds up my head?'
She replied, 'No, it is because it can hold the head of a friend or a loved one when they cry. Everybody needs a shoulder to cry on sometime in life, my dear. I only hope that you have enough love and friends that you will always have a shoulder to cry on when you need it.'
Then and there I knew the most important body part is not a selfish one.
It is made for others and not for yourself. It is sympathetic to the pain of others.
People will forget what you said. People will forget what you did . But people will NEVER forget how you made them feel.
The origination of this letter is unknown, but it brings a blessing to everyone who passes it on. Good friends are like stars...You don't always see them, but you always know they are there.
Tuesday, June 7, 2011
Sunday, June 5, 2011
Superb Advice from Father...
Following is a letter to his son from a renowned Hong Kong TV broadcaster cum Child Psychologist.
The words are actually applicable to all of us, young or old, children or
parents.!
I am writing this to you because of 3 reasons
1. Life, fortune and mishaps are unpredictable, nobody knows how long he
lives. Some words are better said early.
2. I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.
3. What is written is my own personal bitter experiences that perhaps
could save you a lot of unnecessary heartaches.
Remember the following as you go through life
1. Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has
the responsibility of treating you well, except your mother and I.
To those who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and
ALSO you have to be cautious, because, everyone has a motive for every
move.
When a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You
have to be careful, don't hastily regard him as a real friend.
2. No one is indispensable, nothing in the world that you must possess.
Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through
life when people around you don't want you anymore, or when you lose
what/who you love most.
3. Life is short. When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find
that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better
you enjoy life.
4. Love is but a transient feeling, and this feeling would fade with time
and with one's mood.
If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient, time will wash away
your aches and sadness. Don't over exaggerate the beauty and sweetness of
love, and don't over exaggerate the sadness of falling out of love.
5. A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does
not mean that you can be successful by not studying hard!
Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life. One can go from rags
to riches, but one has to start from some rags!
6. I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old, neither
would I financially support your whole life.
My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up.
After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or
in your limousine, whether rich or poor.
7. You honour your words, but don't expect others to be so.
You can be good to people, but don't expect people to be good to you. If
you don't understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.
8. I have bought lotteries for umpteen years, but I never strike any
prize.
That shows if you want to be rich, you have to work hard!
There is no free lunch!
9. No matter how much time I have with you, let's treasure the time we
have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life .
Your Ever loving Dad.
The words are actually applicable to all of us, young or old, children or
parents.!
I am writing this to you because of 3 reasons
1. Life, fortune and mishaps are unpredictable, nobody knows how long he
lives. Some words are better said early.
2. I am your father, and if I don't tell you these, no one else will.
3. What is written is my own personal bitter experiences that perhaps
could save you a lot of unnecessary heartaches.
Remember the following as you go through life
1. Do not bear grudge towards those who are not good to you. No one has
the responsibility of treating you well, except your mother and I.
To those who are good to you, you have to treasure it and be thankful, and
ALSO you have to be cautious, because, everyone has a motive for every
move.
When a person is good to you, it does not mean he really likes you. You
have to be careful, don't hastily regard him as a real friend.
2. No one is indispensable, nothing in the world that you must possess.
Once you understand this idea, it would be easier for you to go through
life when people around you don't want you anymore, or when you lose
what/who you love most.
3. Life is short. When you waste your life today, tomorrow you would find
that life is leaving you. The earlier you treasure your life, the better
you enjoy life.
4. Love is but a transient feeling, and this feeling would fade with time
and with one's mood.
If your so called loved one leaves you, be patient, time will wash away
your aches and sadness. Don't over exaggerate the beauty and sweetness of
love, and don't over exaggerate the sadness of falling out of love.
5. A lot of successful people did not receive a good education, that does
not mean that you can be successful by not studying hard!
Whatever knowledge you gain is your weapon in life. One can go from rags
to riches, but one has to start from some rags!
6. I do not expect you to financially support me when I am old, neither
would I financially support your whole life.
My responsibility as a supporter ends when you are grown up.
After that, you decide whether you want to travel in a public transport or
in your limousine, whether rich or poor.
7. You honour your words, but don't expect others to be so.
You can be good to people, but don't expect people to be good to you. If
you don't understand this, you would end up with unnecessary troubles.
8. I have bought lotteries for umpteen years, but I never strike any
prize.
That shows if you want to be rich, you have to work hard!
There is no free lunch!
9. No matter how much time I have with you, let's treasure the time we
have together. We do not know if we would meet again in our next life .
Your Ever loving Dad.
Sunday, December 20, 2009
A memorial to son
A lady in a faded grey dress and her husband, dressed in a homespun suit walked in timidly without an appointment into the Harvard University President's outer office. The secretary could tell in a moment that such backwoods , country hicks had no business at Harvard and probably didn't even deserve to be in Harvard.
"We want to see the President "the man said softly.
"He'll be busy all day "the secretary snapped.
"We'll wait" the lady replied.
For hours the secretary ignored them , hoping that the couple would finally become discouraged and go away. They didn't and the secretary grew frustrated and finally decided to disturb the president..
"Maybe if you see them for a few minutes , they'll leave" she said to him. The President , stern faced and with dignity , strutted toward the couple.
The lady told him "We had a son who attended Harvard for one year. He loved Harvard. He was happy here. But about a year ago , he was accidentally killed.. My husband and I would like to erect a memorial to him , somewhere on campus."
The president wasn't touched....He was shocked. "Madam "he said , gruffly , " we can't put up a statue for every person who attended Harvard and died. If we did , this place would look like a cemetery."
"Oh , no , " the lady explained quickly "We don't want to erect a statue. We thought we would like to give a building to Harvard."
The president rolled his eyes. He glanced at the gingham dress and homespun suit , and then exclaimed , "A building ! Do you have any earthly idea how much a building costs? We have over seven and a half million dollars in the physical buildings here at Harvard."
For a moment the lady was silent. The president was pleased. Maybe he could get rid of them now. The lady turned to her husband and said quietly , "Is that all it costs to start a university ? Why don't we just start our own?"
Her husband nodded. The president's face wilted in confusion and bewilderment. Mr. and Mrs. Leland Stanford got up and walked away , traveling to Palo Alto , California where they established the University that bears their name. Stanford University , a memorial to a son that Harvard no longer cared about.
Most of the time we judge people by their outer appearance , which can be misleading.. And in this impression , we tend to treat people badly by thinking they can do nothing for us. Thus we tend to lose our potential good friends , employees or customers.
Remember In our Life , we seldom get people with whom we want to share & grow our thought process. But because of our inner EGO we miss them forever.
It is you who have to decide with whom you are getting associated in day to day life.
I end this beautiful story with a note: Small people talk about others , Average people talk about things , Great people talk about ideas.